You’re angry. Bitter. Offended. You can’t believe that he said that to you, about you, behind your back. Forgiveness? Not likely.
Your kids are waging war against you, and a new skirmish breaks out every thirty minutes. Peace? That will be the day.
You and your spouse have a house-busting conflict. Again. Repair a marriage that was broken years ago? Impossible.
Your relationship with your mom/dad/spouse/child is no longer about enjoyment. It’s about survival.
Is there any hope for these relationships? Is there any hope for your sin-torn relationships? There is, and it’s called the gospel.
The gospel isn’t just about fixing your relationship God. It also infuses hope into every human relationship. Ephesians 2:13-14 says:
But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility.
Our greatest relational problem isn’t horizontal, it’s vertical. God offered us friendship, we responded in rebellion. God treated with kindness, we treated him with contempt. God had all authority over us. We kicked and screamed, insisting on going our own way. That’s a serious relational problem. Created by us. An uncrossable rift between us and God. Only dramatic divine intervention could rescue this relationship.
Jesus Christ was that divine intervention. Through his atoning work, he has brought peace between us and God. Our greatest relational problem was solved at the cross. We have peace with God.
God has reconciled us to himself, and now he’s in the business of reconciling us to each other. Forgiving others is possible because God forgave us. Harmony between and angry father and a rebellious son is possible because God has brought us into harmony with himself. Reconciliation between warring spouses is possible because we’ve been reconciled to God. The gospel brings relationship-healing power.
Don’t give up on seemingly “impossible” relationships. God has already done the “impossible” by restoring us to himself. No relationship is beyond the saving, restoring power of the gospel.
+photo by Akbar Simonese
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow! I really needed this today! I have been really struggling with my stepson. He and his 17 year old girlfriend are expecting a baby in June. I have really been struggling to love him and her because of all of the stress that they have inflicted on my marriage and just our lives in general. i struggle too, because I really wanted to have children and for some reason the Lord has not given us that in the natural sense.
Thank you once again for just a great reminder of this incredible good news of the gospel, as you said above, No relationship is beyond the saving, restoring power of the gospel. Praise God for that awesome truth!
Blessings
Ron Reffett
thanks. there are several relationships that my heart just yearns to see reconciled, but currently are, as you put it, war torn, for one reason or another. i needed to hear the reminder that reconciliation is possible. but that ultimately my hope is not even in a “perfect” reconciliation, but in the God who drew me back to Him. its easy to lose hope and thing that things will just always “be this way.”
as I look back, I can see that every work of grace that has happened in my life and in my relationships over the past 4 years is completely a work of His grace alone. And so I know that any changes that will happen in current and future relationships will also be by His grace alone.
I know that the heart of my Heavenly Father is for unity. and that even if that doesn’t happen the way I would like or in the timing I would choose, that He is still in control.
Looking back to the forgiveness that God has granted me has helped me so much when it comes to forgiving others… whether they come and ask for it or not, whether I think they deserve it or not, and whether I think they have “suffered long enough” or not. Ultimately its about the forgiveness that God has granted me… a sinner who did not deserve it or earn it. And so, though its hard, I’m learning what that means to grant that same kind of forgiveness to others.
great post today. thanks.
Your challenge to forgive drives me to my knees– to forgive sometimes seems a near impossible task until I take a clear look at myself and see the wretched sinner that I am saved by an amazingly gracious God!
Sometimes I think I understand forgiveness. But, sometimes I just really don’t get what it “looks” like. And, how do you balance forgiveness and protection against further pain? Or, is that where faith comes in?
Thanks for todays post. I find hope and encouragement… My family is in the midst of a “war” and I feel relationships tearing. I want desprately don’t want to be torn apart and so struggle against anger and unforgiveness in my heart. I’ve repented to God but I also need to repent to my father. Doing so would involve confrontation… How does a daughter confront her father? New myself to this amzaing gospel of grace, how does one show grace and hold accountability at the same time?
Last week I was reading in Luke 12. How do verses 49-53 relate with all of this?
Thank you all for sharing your comments and thoughts.
Michelle and Sonya – Because your questions are so thoughtful, open, and difficult, I would encourage you to bring them your pastor or other mature Christian. I think they would be able to bring you much more effective help than I can through the blog comment section.
Thank you so much for sharing your struggles openly! Your humility is commendable. I’m so grateful for how many of you share your thoughts and comments.
This is very encouraging. Love the picture!
I just got done reading your book. I enjoyed the last sections of the book the most. There is a special connection between Christianity and people involved in sports that I believe is not being explored enough. But anyways, I like some of your articles on this blog, also.
Thanks DTH! I’m glad you enjoyed the book and found it helpful.