So you finally learned to play the guitar and now you’re wondering, “How do I write a truly awful worship song?”
You’ve come to the right place my friend. Here are some sure fire ways to write a truly horrible worship song.
Recycle A Love Song.
Write a song for your girlfriend. When she breaks up with you, convert it into a worship song. Be sure to change all uses of “girl” or “baby”.
Use Time Tested Rhymes.
Make sure that you rhyme “love” and “above” at least twice. The song becomes doubly awful if you can also incorporate the word “dove”. Example: “You sent your love from above, makes my heart feel like a pure white dove.” You get the point.
Be Vague About Your Theology
Make sure to avoid any theology at all costs. Don’t talk about atonement, wrath, or any other biblical concepts. You want your song to be all about feeling. Don’t let the mind get in the way. Repeat after me: “Worship is a warm feeling, sort of like heartburn, only better.”
Make the Song All About You
The main point of your song should be your experiences and how God makes you feel. Don’t bother with objective truth about God. I would suggest that you use the words “I” or “me” at least 12-15 times. For example, “I feel like singing, yes I feel like spinning, because You make me feel so good inside. Like it’s my birthday, but more awesome.”
Be Incredibly Poetic
If you can, muddy the waters with poetic phrases that don’t make much sense. Example: “Your love is like a warm summer’s breeze, washing over my heart like a crystal river.”
Use Well-Worn Musical Progressions
If you can, keep your music and melody boring. I would suggest that you use no more than four distinct notes in a song, so that by the time someone is done listening to it they want to scream. A worship scream, but a scream nonetheless. It also helps if you use the chords G, C, and D over and over.
Defend Your Song Like It’s Your Firstborn Child
Do not, I repeat, do not, let anyone make suggestions for improvement. Tell people that God laid the song on your heart. Tell people that you really want to preserve the artistic integrity of the song. Tell people that you already did the song at your campus ministry and that a revival broke out. Don’t take advice from anyone.
There you have it. Seven ways to write a terrible worship song. You can thank me later.
What else would you add to the list?
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{ 230 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow, I can't think of anything else to add to the list. This seems like it about sums it up.
Write in overblown statements about how dedicated you are to God even though it is not an accurate description of your spiritual life or of anyone likely to be singing it. eg.
- Jesus I will tell the whole world about you
- Jesus you mean everything to me
- Jesus, I'm totally devoted to you
- I will live every moment of everyday for you
Doesn't matter if you haven't thought of God most days last week, haven't tried to tell anyone about Jesus in years and have a heart full of idols, including the lines above is legitimate you are trying to write awful worship songs.
Your point about making the song about you is spot on. I'm a music theory geek, and I've done some basic analysis of the texts of various sets of worship songs. Just in terms of word frequency, one can notice some interesting things about our worship songs. One big thing is that the current CCLI top 25 has way more high-frequency words that are self-reflexive (words like 'sing,' 'praise,' 'worship,' etc.) than any other set of songs I looked at (including other contemporary sets). It's amazing, then, looking back at those songs and seeing so many lines in our most popular songs that are about what we're doing (I'm singing, I'm worshipping, I'm dancing, I'm lifting my hands, etc.) rather than about why we're doing it (like you say, the atonement, grace, wrath, etc.).
Be sure to totally ignore the concept of time signatures, because let's face it, all worship songs sound better when they're morose and dirge-like.
Yeah, I like singing emo, sad, dirge-like worship songs. They really build me up…
Write it in a key that's too HIGH for guys and too low for the ladies. Also, include at least 2 guitar solos of 90 seconds plus each that could never be duplicated by anyone.
Yes guitar solos! We've lost that touch since the 80's disappeared. Thanks for reminding me to put that in my next song.
so… like… Lincoln Brewster
Now there's a challenge!
Repetition! Sing the same seven words at least eleven times- or at least until people get emotional.
Yeah. People seem to think that if you repeat something enough, it will finally bring them to tears.
Ah, yes, the "7-11 Chorus!"
Like "Trading my Sorrows". The chorus of that song "Yes Lord, Yes Lord, Yes, Yes, Lord" seems like it was bolted on as if there wasn't anything else to make the song complete.
I once listened to a youth group sing a "praise song" in which the same verse was sung repetitively, redundant, again & again 27 (I may have lost count). After they were finished, the Youth Pastor gave me permission to ask the question, "Without singing, but just in conversational word, what did you just sing?" Not a single youth was able to repeat what they just sang 28 times!
This is so true about so many of today's contemporary worship songs. BTW "worship" does not mean music exclusively. I am worshipping the Lord by what I am writing here.
Here's a tip: have a chorus or bridge that consists entirely of "Lala"s or "nana"s. Or "LALANANANANA!"
You've got it brando. And I do know what song you're thinking of.
Don't forget a bunch of "wo-oahs," too!
Don't forget a bunch of "wo-oahs," too!
. . . or add "yeah, yeah, yeah" a few extra times instead of meaningful praises to Christ Jesus. Be sure that it and the other 3-7 verses are repeated at least 10 times to get everyone in the "mood".
Antithesis: Matthew 6:7; 1 Corinthians 13:1
So funny and oh, so true in experience. Thanks Stephen!
My pleasure!
Change what you are talking about. Talk to god, then about God. Talk about the second coming, then the glories of God in creation, then about Jesus healing power
Wow, a bump from Challies. Dude, you're going to be famous!
… a well deserved bump I might add.
You know, if someone could include "propitiation" without killing the song, I think that might actually be pretty cool.
Heather Clark did.
Oh that's genius. I forgot about that one. It's great to try to include 14 different ideas in one song.
It's especially good to write songs when you're feeling down and don't have any perspective on God's truth.
How about: switch which person of God you're addressing?
"Thank you Jesus, you're my Lord, you sent your Son for us and now you're living in my heart"
Ruh roh, I've got to find a new theme for my site. Dang, I was just starting to like it, now I've found TWO other Christian bloggers using it. Stink.
We are laughing at ourselves here. No one said someone is an idiot. Stop taking things so personal.
How 'bout "God was ready for our 'sitcheeashun'/He gave us propitiation"?????? (sorry)
So what does one do when presented with one of these songs on a Sunday morning? Sing along?
I wouldn't be afraid to walk out till the song is over. I've done it.
Celeste is on the spot. Write no more than a 1 verse so that the audience sings the 4 line chorus for five minutes straight.
Also, be sure to make a PowerPoint presentation featuring your lyrics flashing over nature scenes like rushing rivers,sunny meadows, couldy skies, and glorious sunsets.
As previously mentioned by Brando, the lalalalala and nanananana is the piece de resistance of any happening worship tune. Who needs words when you can use lala’s that on the Holy Spirit can understand.
I have a friend who changes the words when he sings songs like this.
Stephen, on that last note, God didn't just lay the song on your heart, He inspired you! Your song is just as inspired as Scripture… it may even be more inspired.
Okay — but I have found over the years that lots of folks claim God told them to do something that, by observing the fruits of their claim, that God had nothing to do with the so called inspiration. Most often, I see God's name being used to force the use of a certain worship style (typically a boring traditional view). When this happens, I consider it a violation of the 2nd commandment.
NO you cannot use that, the Gaithers put a copyright on that idea!
Best comment for sure.
Hey Bernard thanks for stopping by. I'm really sorry that you took this personally. I'm a songwriter who has written a lot of awful songs, so this was aimed first at me. I really didn't have anyone in mind when I wrote this post. I just wanted a good laugh.
I think you should write a worship song. Anyone who has tried to write a worship song knows that you write 10 awful ones for every 1 good one. So don't give up!
Make sure that the first time you sing it in congregational worship that you get the tone-deaf pastor who has a hard time singing Amazing Grace on key, to lead for you! That should be a sure fire way to sell the song. (I'm referring to myself here.)
Timothy, this is your pastor…what are you talking about? I sing great!…and you're fired!
Oh that's always a good strategy. Give people the ol switcheroo.
If it's just cheesy, I think it's best to sing along, rather than distract others from worshipping because we're laughing or rolling our eyes or whatever. We aren't there to judge the song leader/writer but to worship God, study his Word, and edify our brothers and sisters in Christ.
However, if there is something about the doctrinal content of the lyrics such that you can't sing it in faith, then I'd say it's best not to sing along, since whatever does not proceed from faith is sin (Romans 14:23). And if that's a recurring problem, I'd bring it up with a pastor or elder. Whether the song leader is off, or you're not fully on board with what the church teaches, they are the ones ultimately responsible for the doctrine that is taught (even if it comes in the form of song lyrics), and they are also called to shepherd your soul.
In all seriousness, if you find yourself singing one of these songs, sing the parts that are true and don't sing the parts that aren't. Don't stop worshiping the Lord. Just ensure that you're singing truth to God.
yay for practicality! I spent a few years in a church (arguably the greatest church ever) where a lot of discernment went into song-choice (we actually did a lot of SovGrace music). Since moving away, I've found a church I like but it seems the discernment and wisdom included in the sermons has not migrated to song choice yet. They're hard waters to navigate on a Sunday morning.
Thanks for the help!
yay for practicality! I spent a few years in a church (arguably the greatest church ever) where a lot of discernment went into song-choice (we actually did a lot of SovGrace music). Since moving away, I've found a church I like but it seems the discernment and wisdom included in the sermons has not migrated to song choice yet. They're hard waters to navigate on a Sunday morning.
Thanks for the help!
Yep. My songs are on par with scripture. No criticism allowed.
Yeah, that's always helpful for the congregation. It's even better if you don't have rhythm either.
I always like several key signature changes. And don't forget the accidentals!!
Brilliant.
While I though the original post was really funny, I share your dislike of looking down noses at others who are "idiots." A friend of mine wrote a wonderful song about it with great lines like, "you're the only good one here." But that's the point isn't it. Jesus came to us idiots and thanks be to God that he did!
I agree with Stephen. If you have any desire to write a song, definitely write it! It doesn't have to be a mindblowing song with perfect theology, if it's simply a way for you to express your thanksgiving to him for his unfailing love and the sacrifice his Son made for your salvation. And whether or not God uses it in the church on a broad scale or gives you a recording contract, the act of sitting down and intentionally writing out your thoughts and feelings in response to the Gospel puts you in a great position to meditate on God's Word, the work of Christ, and to listen to what the Spirit has to teach you.
“warm summer’s breeze, washing over my heart like a crystal river”…
Warm and wet, not unlike incontinence.
I really didn't take this particular post personally – sorry I gave that impression. I agree with you 1000% – a HUGE number of really popular songs are only popular because record labels push them to radio and "everybody knows them", not because they are good. Some are downright awful, and I am embarrassed by many of them just like you are. Didn't mean to sound so offended – sorry!
Thick skin is a lot like faith. It's a gift from God that we have to pray for. Some of us would really like to have it but don't seem to have the DNA to grow it…
However, in my defense, it's not that I took THIS post so personally. The issue is the theory that only good theologians should write songs. Takes a lot of wind out of my sails, and probably those of others, as well. I do think that songwriters should work hard to perfect their craft, and it's often embarrassing how few do so. I just don't want to be one of the ones that are quoted in posts like these, so I tend to hold my cards pretty close to my chest these days
I think that's a good point. Only good theologians should write worship songs. Because, uh, we don't want bad theology sung in our churches. I don't think that necessitates any advanced degrees or anything. It just requires learning the Faith in a good church. But dang man, no offense at all, but worship songs are not for popular airplay on Christian radio stations. Worship songs are for the Church to gather around and honor God with as a collective Body. They better dang well be full of rich and good theology. And if people aren't going to write theologically good songs, than we need to recruit new song writers. And if the churches aren't raising up theologically astute disciples–SHAME ON HER. And that is often the case, too.
How about writing a worship song from God's perspective? The weirdest I have ever felt was when this type of song came up in worship. For example, "By your side" by tenth avenue north is an alright song, but it was very awkward to sing to God: "I'll be by your side whenever you fall in the dead of night…my hands are holding you".
Also, I participated in a choir that sang a version of a popular worship song that had 7, yes 7 key changes. Crazy.
It seems like the vast majority of worship music sounds the same. What better way to worship our God of creativity, eh?
Write it on your own, very late at night, in a wistful or melancholy mood.
Oh, how funny and yet so very sad because it's so prevalent in today's church/worship music culture!!! I think we need a few more "how to _ awful" posts!
The melody should also span at least 3 octaves making it very difficult for anyone but a member of The Met Opera Chorus to sing. Oh, and the melody should be so complex that it's easier to sing harmony rather than melody.
most of the organists worth their salt (are there ANY left other than a handful?) wouldn't be caught DEAD playing the drivel that passes for 'worship music' these days.
If you have a church pianist (or even better, organist) have her/him accompany you by banging on the keyboard so hard and 'lively' that no one can understand what you are saying. Also, sing with so much 'feeling' that you start crying and warbling. Stare at the ceiling for maximum effect.
Oh yes, and have the piano so loud (usually played by the music pastor's wife) that the other instruments (bass, guitars, keyboard) can't be heard in the worship hall all, and then take great offense (or ignore) when someone makes the suggestion that the piano is too loud.
FWIW, I've used "propitiation" in a new hymn. Once. And I think it worked. I'll not defend it like my firstborn child, though.
http://www.churchworksmedia.com/hymns/his-robes-f...
http://www.churchworksmedia.com/wp-content/upload...
Anyway, great post, Stephen. Hilariously true.
I think these incidents present a really good opportunity to quietly pick up your Bible and read the Psalms. Non ones distracted, you are not being cynical and you are still engaging in worship, preparing your heart for the next song which will hopefully be better.
This doesn't sound so much like ways to write bad worship songs as it does a critique of 'How He Loves' by John Mark McMillan. Namely,
1. Be Vague about theology
2. Make the song all about you
3. Be incredibly poetic
4.Use well worn musical progression, no more than 4 chords
I don't mean to be critical, I think McMillan means well and has good motives, but this is true of his song.
I wasn't thinking of any song in particular when I wrote this post.
Whoa, This is interesting. I will say How he loves us hit me to the core. It was a song written in heartache, but ministered to my heartache.
God used someone to share that song with me while I was struggling in a situation.
I didnt know that months later when I saw John Marks story video on youtube, that he had written that song in heartache.
Personally it blesses me, and helped me be more in love with God. It ministered to me!
you could crow-bar propitiation in if you did it like D.I.S.C.O… i.e.
he was P – penatent… he was R – really God… he was O, oooooohhhhhhhhhh….
perhaps.?
This kind of mentality has basically killed any desire I might have ever had to write worship songs, just BTW, because I don't want to be one of the people that some self appointed theologically advanced person criticizes for writing a stupid worship song.
I'm a guy who halfway agrees with a lot of reformed theology but gets really pissed off at the "everybody else is an idiot" mentality that seems to be the trademark.
i think the key point of this article is the "defend your song like it's your firstborn child" point. there is nothing wrong with writing a song of personal worship to the Lord no matter your theology level. it comes from your heart and is your best attempt to glorify God. however, constructive criticism is always useful. most good songwriters get advice from others about their songs to check themselves, to make sure they do not lead other believers astray with incorrect theology. we can't just sing songs because someone was trying to write good praise: that stands for contemporary and ancient hymns alike.
If you're in a pinch for words, insert "Hallelujah" ad infinitum. It's spiritual language, and it's in the Bible, so you're just being faithful to Scripture.
God will have the final say as to whether a worship song is 'good' or not. Whether it is good depends on many many factors, none of which have been addressed here. What if the writer just picked up a guitar, and did use G, C and D.. but used them with a killer melody and heartfelt lyrics? What if he/she doesn't know much theology but had a genuine encounter with God. Can we honestly say that God looks at that and turns away??! Foolishness!
Here are two that have driven me nuts lately:
…Change, for no reason, between using “Thee”/”Thou” and “You” to address the Lord.
…Change without warning from the perspective of the worshiper to the perspective of Christ or the Father.
Yeah, Bernard, I'd also say there's a difference between writing personal worship songs that you use to sing to the Lord vs. writing worship songs for others.
It's a lot like writing a love song (not that I'm a master at that): you can write one that's just between you and your lover but when you try to get everyone else to use the same song, you have to make other considerations.
-Marshall Jones Jr.
yes, I definitely think we are laughing at ourselves here, but my take away (with a smile!) is that I ought to engage my mind as I am singing a song of worship to God. I must take personal responsibility for sorting through the biblical accuracy of my worship songs, so I found this humorous post made me stop & think about that. My emotions aren't trustworthy–yikes, I could prove that with the past 2 weeks I've had; but the truths about God are, so I need to have my heart & my mind involved as I am singing (i'd say writing, but I'm no musician!)
I never made that connection before. Interesting…
Nice. Sounds like your scheme backfired!
Woah! 7 key changes? I didn't even know that was possible!
Rob, this wasn't mean to slam anyone. This was purely for fun. I've written dozens of awful songs and I like to poke fun at bad songwriting. This wasn't directed at anyone. I'm not judging the heart behind any song. I'm simply pointing out that there is a good way to write a song and a bad way.
Stephen, your post was good and funny and taken as satirical and I did enjoy it, it was some of the following comments that just rubbed me the wrong way, as if there is a wrong or right way to sing or worship God?! It's folks like 'laura' and their comments that are of bad taste and do nothing for building the kingdom. It's really quite sad.
Rob, I think you should take yourself a little less seriously. It's not a sin to point out that something someone is doing is ridiculous–in fact sometimes it's the best thing you can do for them. What's sad is indicting any comment that rubs you the wrong way as being detrimental to the kingdom.
Jordan, I totally agree with you and with Stephen. This post was spot on and I'm all about humor and God forbid that I take myself too seriously, all I was saying was that some of the tone of a few of the comments seemed to be tearing down others rather than building them up.
I agree. I'm a song writer and have written dozens of awful songs. My point was just to poke fun at bad songwriting, not to make fun of the heart behind it.
You forgot the "storm" metaphor! Every awful worship song must have a line or two about a storm being calmed, it's our creed!
A lot of hymns that contain such metaphors were written at a time when a lot of ordinary people were sailors, or at least travelled by boat reasonably frequently. So the songs were taking the things they knew from everyday and drawing out the parallels with the relationship with God, just as Jesus did. An interesting quirk is that we don't seem to be doing the same things nowadays. There are, for example, a LOT of parallels between a mobile phone and God (God's phone never runs out of battery, you can always get a signal to call God, etc etc), but current songwriting fashions are to not include them, and song-choosing trends are to keep including the ones that were relevent to the everyday life of people a few hundred years ago and not to today.
Now whether we are going to start writing songs that include a lot of parallels to modern life is another question, so long as we are aware of what we're doing.
I agree Shannon. I was thinking mainly of corporate worship songs.
I agree also, I am always singing my own songs to God all day long – especially when I'm doing manual labor. Sometimes I'll think a song's real good and sing it over and over – then realize it was meant just between me and God Himself. But some of them are just random thoughts of praise and/or thanksgiving.
I happened to have been drinking coffee when reading your comment. Now, sir, you owe me a new keyboard!
Doesn't Driscoll call these "prom songs to Jesus" or something?
Also, it's helpful to string "Christian-y" phrases together such as: You are my God, You are the one, I'm lost in Your love, Hallelujah to the Son,….
I wrote one of those once on purpose, just to be "offensive", to make a point, just for fun. It is now sung in several churches as a warm worship song. Sigh. To anyone who has endured it, I apologize.
what song is it if you don't mind me asking?
Definitely add some sort of mantra (preferably of two or three words) that can be chanted endlessly when you're in a worship frenzy – maybe something like "I'm alive!" or "Help me, Lord!"
Make sure the melody is indistinct and unpredictable so that only the leader really knows where the song is going. Then when people finally figure out the flow of the song, just say "sing to the Lord a new song" and start singing random phrases to no particular tune and expect the congregation to do the same.
There is nothing wrong with singing with feeling, whether is ithe Worship of God, or classical music(Mozart, Schubert ) or opera or Irish Celtic Ballads. sining with Feeling is part of the Joy of Sining. By the way I am a Born-Again, Sprit filled pentecostal, and a Classically trained singer. Nothing wrong with that.
I'm not sure this was meant to slam my brothers and sisters who pour out their hearts to God through songs. Who can judge the heart behind a song?
These comments stink of arrogance, not humbleness…
We need to invent a new Internet Law for conversations about worship songs, like a corollary to Godwin's Law. We could call it Altrogge's Law: as the comments thread on a satirical, light-hearted post about bad worship music lengthens, the probability of someone getting offended and using words like "judgement" and "arrogance" approaches 1.
I knew this comment would be by Laura Roberts before I clicked on it.
*blushes*
LOL!!
I think God is offended more often than we presume. Thanks for the encouraging remarks and the building up of the kingdom…
Listen, Rob, you are attributing all kinds of things to me, being sarcastic and unkind, and you do not know me, nor my heart.
I appreciate you coming back and clarifying. I'm very sorry if my words offended you — in my (unfortunately extensive) experience with blogs on this topic, people will come by, drop a comment with a whole bunch of rude words in it, and leave in a huff, and you sounded like one of those people. I'm glad to know that you're not, that you're willing to come back and explain further what you intended.
But, brother, just as you find people's words judgmental on this subject of worship music, your words toward me — a sister in Christ whom you do not know — have been very judgmental.
Furthermore, there IS "a wrong or right way to sing or worship God". Your premise is wrong, and your application of that premise has been uncharitable.
You know what, I'm glad we are all on the same team. I'm not one to be 'judgmental' however I have found my tone here was quite judgmental and for that I apologize.
I'm sure if these conversations would have happened in person, things might have been a little different.
Hope you all have a great weekend and God bless!
Rob,
I totally hear what you're saying, but there are many of these songs that are written by a formula simply to make money. Isn't that a wrong way to worship God?
Really not trying to drop a bomb and run, but I do think that there are folks who write these things and they never intend to worship (At least not God), but they intend to cash in.
Im with you Rob. I mean no disrespect to the author of the post, but haven't we heard all this before? The worship songs jokes have been told and recycled to the point they are just as cheesy and unoriginal as… hmmm
It's not the post that's annoying so much as it is the arrogant comments that follow.
Mainstream worship music is mainstream because people connect with it in large numbers. I can be a music snob and scoff at the shallow minds and bad taste of the mass church or I can write and play music that my congregation understands.
The pile on of "commercial" worship music is cliche and overdone and is becoming predictable and ridiculous
Unfortunately, mainstream worship music seems to be only popular with mainstream worship music lovers and Christians of a particular sub-culture. I review music for WL mag and write for a few other worship pubs and have discovered that – across the board – people "outside" the church and those of us returning to the church find worship music to be musically, lyrically, and thematically frustrating and uninteresting. And maybe even a tad dishonest (hides from flying rocks). I agree with you that these kinds of parodies have become something predictable, but the sad part is that it doesn't seem as if the culture has taken a long enough (or maybe legitimate enough) look at the deeper issues being presented in the satire. There's no one right way to worship, but there are definitely some wrong ways. At least we can all agree that we want to affirm the character and great works of GOD, eh?
Dustin,
I gotta disagree with you. We need to pile it on in MASSIVE LOADS. The critiques may be unoriginal, but clearly the point has not gotten across because nothing has changed.
I do agree that the best way to change this is to write good stuff, but like I said in one of my other posts, the "commercial" labels don't pick up the good stuff because it doesn't follow the formula. Only way to let the labels know that we want to hear better is for people to really look at the music they listen to critically and stop buying the junk.
As the lead in our praise and worship team, I say amen to you brother! Anita
Yeah, Bernard, I'd also say there's a difference between writing personal worship songs that you use to sing to the Lord vs. writing worship songs for others.
It's a lot like writing a love song (not that I'm a master at that): you can write one that's just between you and your lover but when you try to get everyone else to use the same song, you have to make other considerations.
-Marshall Jones Jr.
make very sure it's a scremo song with lots of distorded guitar and double bass drumming.
Oh yeah, key changes are brutal.
All the best awful worship songs modulate up through the final choruses. If it doesn't begin in an unsingable key it will end in one! Nice post!
Rob, this wasn't mean to slam anyone. This was purely for fun. I've written dozens of awful songs and I like to poke fun at bad songwriting. This wasn't directed at anyone. I'm not judging the heart behind any song. I'm simply pointing out that there is a good way to write a song and a bad way.
At first, I agree with you, but only if you clarify "Corporate" worship… I can write thousands of songs that are from my heart, and my life experience (I mean, whole Davidic Psalms are straight out of his personal experience, to the point that were we to make them a corporate song they'd be totally vague and unintelligable for most folks) and there would be absolutely no doubt that they are "worship" by nearly full-orbed, Biblical definition of the word, and it's quite possible that they might even be "good" (or, rather, well-received by many, popular, etc.) – so, in that sense the song (or, as I mentioned, a good many of David's songs) wouldn't be a bad "worship song", but might be a very bad "corporate worship song". I'm in the middle of releasing my first worship CD, so this issue is near and dear to my heart: I'm including chords in my press-kit for those songs intended for corporate use, but also realize that I've included some tunes that though there's no doubt about it that they are "worship", are so personal, that at best they might be used as a "special", but will mostly be the songs that certain individuals would really connect to in their quiet times, or while driving in their cars. Is the song "bad" for being personal (about me), less theologically detailed, or poetic – not necessarily, but I wouldn't ever expect for it to be used in a corporate setting. Keep writing great tunes – yours are some of my favorite SGM songs, and there are a few I pull out and use regularly, but – alas – there as a few that, though I really connect to them, don't connect with those I lead – they're from a very different place than where they are, so the songs just don't make much sense to them, though I love them… so, for me, some of your tunes, too, just aren't very "corporate", but man… I'd never say that they weren't deep, and beautiful worship to God. Looking forward to hearing more!
Hmmmm. At what point does it become cliche to make fun of bad worship music?
Also, it's helpful to string "Christian-y" phrases together such as: You are my God, You are the one, I'm lost in Your love, Hallelujah to the Son,….
I am distressed by songs with lyrics like “Lord, I don’t know what to say” and “God, I can’t express how I feel.”
These kinds of lyrics seem lazy to me. I admire the honesty, but isn’t it the task of the poet or songwriter to give musical expression to elusive thoughts and feelings?
Definitely add some sort of mantra (preferably of two or three words) that can be chanted endlessly when you're in a worship frenzy – maybe something like "I'm alive!" or "Help me, Lord!"
Definitely add some sort of mantra (preferably of two or three words) that can be chanted endlessly when you're in a worship frenzy – maybe something like "I'm alive!" or "Help me, Lord!"
use phrases that would sound uncomfortably sexual in any other context. A few examples:
"I need your touch"
"Wrap your arms around me"
"Your embrace makes me whole"
"let me to thy bosom fly"
How did we forget that one? Those make me cringe
FINE. But other than the first two lines (tooootally awkward), "Jesus Lover of My Soul" is a fantastic hymn.
I also want to point out the irony that Stephen chose the word "Awful" considering that "I Stand in AWE of You" is Mark's classic worship song. Hmmm…Freudian slip perhaps?
I kid! I kid!
I also want to point out the irony that Stephen chose the word "Awful" considering that "I Stand in AWE of You" is Mark's classic worship song. Hmmm…Freudian slip perhaps?
I kid! I kid!
No slip. I did actually think of the connection between the word "awe" and "awful".
hey, it worked for Handel
I'm not sure that the original purpose of "How He Loves Us" was to be a song for corporate worship. I believe the song was written when Mr. McMillan lost a dear friend and brother in ministry in a car accident. I believe that this is his song of grief over the loss of his friend and his acceptance that God's ways are not our ways. I would not want to be judged over anything I said or wrote during a time of such grief, and I think when we are grieving we probably think less about theology and more about just poring it all out to God.
I'm not sure that the original purpose of "How He Loves Us" was to be a song for corporate worship. I believe the song was written when Mr. McMillan lost a dear friend and brother in ministry in a car accident. I believe that this is his song of grief over the loss of his friend and his acceptance that God's ways are not our ways. I would not want to be judged over anything I said or wrote during a time of such grief, and I think when we are grieving we probably think less about theology and more about just poring it all out to God.
Don't have any regard for grammar, and make sure you spell at least two words wrong per stanza.
I don't think these comments stink of arrogance. On the contrary, they are written by people who are fed up with vague, poetic, emotional drivel with no solid theology.
Kelli… that is true. It was not originally written as a "corporate" worship song… in fact, I was probably one of the first people to use it as one (ducks to avoid all the rotten fruit).
Though I don't agree, there are some professional Worship Artists/Songwriters (personal friends) who have written songs that are very theologically sound (they co-write w/ many reformed folks worship-songwriter gurus), and those individuals think that most contemporary worship has grown too cerebral, and not enough in the heart.
Though I don't agree, there are some professional Worship Artists/Songwriters (personal friends) who have written songs that are very theologically sound (they co-write w/ many reformed folks worship-songwriter gurus), and those individuals think that most contemporary worship has grown too cerebral, and not enough in the heart.
We should try to write a song that incorporates all of these
I remember someone telling me, 'the Lord gave me this song', and thinking, the Lord sure uses a lot of mixed metaphors, bad grammar, and trite rhymes! Maybe 'the Lord' needs to go back and polish it up a bit.
Maybe God inspired you, but something got lost in translation???
Jam an old hymn in the middle of a lame, modern song…then go back to the modern tune to finish it out.
I love Jesus.I love Jesus. I love Jesus (repeat six more times and Change key up 1/2 step).
Better than you..better than you…better than you. (Repeat six more times.)
We love Jesus. We love Jesus. We love Jesus
( Repeat six more times and change key up 1/2 step)
Better than you..better than you…better than you!! (Repeat six more times.)
He loves me. He loves me. He loves me (Repeat six more times. Too high already to change key this time.)
Better than you, Better than you. Better than you..(O by now you get the point….)
Great post. I'm with you on the time-tested rhymes thing… http://www.wordandspirit.co.uk/blog/2008/04/04/do...
Make sure that a non-Christian will have no idea what you're talking about. In fact, if it's vague enough you should be able to get non-Christians to sing along without knowing what they are singing. Check out "U2 Yahweh live from Chicago" on youtube and you'll see what I mean.
Seriously though, aren't the song writers selling what we're buying? If today's audiences/congregations were a little more musically literate, wouldn't they demand actual music? Aren't these types of worship ditties exactly the reason that so many of us musicians (I play bass and trumpet) insist on making a distinction between "singers" and "musicians". My kids will all be musically literate and will be able to know good music when they hear it, regardless of it's source or content.
It used to be that the Church is where the great music was. It seems that the Church has now left great music to others. I say it's time to bring it back to the Church!
This one is great advice and should be taken to heart!
I used to hear "church has the best musicians and singers in the world" by preachers all the time growing up… that is no longer the case…
I point it out to my wife all the time – being a musician I "hear" the music first, then the lyrics – I can name at least 50 songs off the top of my head that use the exact same chord progressions, whether country, pop, rock, or of Christian genres…
It all becomes run together and boring from the first few chords of the song…
I can see why this might seem weird to some people, but I think its a brilliant application of Ephesians 5:19
"18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ"
What a great way to tackle our often individualistic 'worship' culture, and have a song that is designed to be sung by congregation members to the rest of the congregation, declaring great truths about God, that remind us of all we have to thank and praise him for.
One of my favourite hymns, How firm a foundation, is written this way, and the lyrics and a free download is available from Covenant Life Church.
See,http://www.covlife.org/static/hymns/how_firm_a_fo...
I agree that songs from God's perspective are very odd when sung by the congregation, though How Firm a Foundation seems to do it very tastefully-I love that song.
"The issue is the theory that only good theologians should write songs."
Yes, only "good theologians" should write songs, books and sermons. Why on earth should we desire people with poorly developed theology to be given ANY platform in which to showcase their ignorance? Only in the church are we okay with the poorly taught leading the poorly taught. Next time I hire someone to do some home repair job, I'm going to reassure the person that they don't need to be good in their profession, they just have to have their "heart in the right place". Same thing for my midwife.
"Who can judge the heart behind a song?"
I can…by using the ruler called the Bible. It is the standard by which we are all judged. How else am I supposed to filter what's right and fitting and what is corrupt and bankrupt?
I know, that just reeks of arrogance. So does spitting out spoiled food, apparently. How arrogant to judge a rotten grape as unfit to eat and enjoy! I mean, the grape didn't mean to be so offensive, it's heart was in the right place. Come on, people. Don't fall into this trap of worldliness where everything is to be tolerated with no judgment made.
I came here from Challies site and thought the post was quite accurate and funny. Of course after reading the comments, it's sad to see what Christians defend.
I'm not going to say all the mean things back to you that initially I wrote. But you ticked me off pretty good with this, just to be honest. In the interest of being and doing what Christ has commanded, I genuinely do want to forgive you, because I believe that Internet relationships between Christians are a frontier that the enemy uses greatly to cause us to "have ought against our brother" and never consider issues of forgiveness and offense. So, while I suspect that you will see absolutely no reason to apologize, I WILL apologize for being angry, because I was very angry, and I shouldn't be. Even though, really, I still am. And that's wrong, too.
The arrogance isn't in spitting the food out. The arrogance is when you insult the starving child in Africa that has no unspoiled food and doesn't know the difference. The arrogance is when a know-it-all theology policeperson tells a well-meaning, enthusiastic Christian that he has no right to compose a musical piece of worship until he comes to full agreement with the theology policeperson. The arrogance comes in the insistence that the theology policeperson has understood every nuance of the Bible perfectly and that any disagreement is always "bad theology", which should result in, according to your statement, being denied a platform. In other words, "I disagree with you, so you must be quiet until you agree with me." THAT is arrogance.
It's all about attitude, ma'am. I'm all for correct theology in songs. But we don't have to be buttholes about it. 'Scuse my coarse language, but I see a spade as a spade and can find no reason to be incorrect in my application, since a good theologian must, above all, be correct in all the words he uses.
I'm sorry you feel this way Bernard. It wasn't my intention to offend or belittle anyone.
To be clear, Stephen, the response wasn't to you – I was specifically responding to Heather.
Doesn't sound like you're too sorry or wanting forgiveness, rather, it sounds like you just wanted to express your unrighteous anger.
Heather, I am in total agreement with you and appreciate the fact that with your better ability with words you took the time to express your (our) thoughts/beliefs.
Thank Marla. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who thinks this way.
Marla – I really don't know what to say here.
I wouldn't either, if I'd said what you had said initially.
Your anger is understandable. You are frustrated that you cannot biblically argue against the need for Christians to be well-informed and astute in their Christian faith BEFORE they seek to lead others in worship and so you are maddened into using language that even you find offensive.
Heather – This is highly unproductive. I'm sorry for being angry with you, but that does not at mean that I think you have everything right. I agree with you that "Christians" should "be well-informed and astute in their Christian faith BEFORE they seek to lead others in worship". If you are accusing me of disagreeing with that, you miss the point greatly. I simply believe that many Christians who perhaps DO have their theology "right" are very mistaken in the insulting approach they presume when they deal with those who perhaps DON'T have their theology "right".
I'm very disappointed with the insulting tone you've chosen to adopt. If I'm misunderstanding that, I'm sorry.
Being sorry for being angry with someone does not at all mean that I agree with them. It simply means that I recognize that my anger is not appropriate, even if they do choose to behave in an inappropriate fashion.
I hope you have a great day. I like John Piper, too
I agree w/ Bernard that this isn't productive, and probably isn't helpful. I would encourage everyone that comments to only say things that you would be comfortable saying to a person face to face. Ephesians 4:29 should be the rule when it comes to commenting.
Stephen, I want to respect your request since this is your site but I do want to clarify something. The reason my responses have been harsh is not indicative of my normal operating procedures but is due to the nature of the original posts. I found them very offensive in what was being suggested.
I understand. Thanks for commenting and for your desire to defend what is true.
I'm not going to say all the mean things back to you that initially I wrote. But you ticked me off pretty good with this, just to be honest. In the interest of being and doing what Christ has commanded, I genuinely do want to forgive you, because I believe that Internet relationships between Christians are a frontier that the enemy uses greatly to cause us to "have ought against our brother" and never consider issues of forgiveness and offense. So, while I suspect that you will see absolutely no reason to apologize, I WILL apologize for being angry, because I was very angry, and I shouldn't be. Even though, really, I still am. And that's wrong, too.
The arrogance isn't in spitting the food out. The arrogance is when you insult the starving child in Africa that has no unspoiled food and doesn't know the difference. The arrogance is when a know-it-all theology policeperson tells a well-meaning, enthusiastic Christian that he has no right to compose a musical piece of worship until he comes to full agreement with the theology policeperson. The arrogance comes in the insistence that the theology policeperson has understood every nuance of the Bible perfectly and that any disagreement is always "bad theology", which should result in, according to your statement, being denied a platform. In other words, "I disagree with you, so you must be quiet until you agree with me." THAT is arrogance.
It's all about attitude, ma'am. I'm all for correct theology in songs. But we don't have to be buttholes about it. 'Scuse my coarse language, but I see a spade as a spade and can find no reason to be incorrect in my application, since a good theologian must, above all, be correct in all the words he uses.
Use 3 words from Scripture and make a whole song out of it…
- Mix your metaphors as much as possible. His love should be like a roaring lion, while you're a gentle flower. Use a metaphor once and then drop it in favor of the next one.
- Be vague and abstract. Spend 5 minutes talking about how you can't describe God. Compare him to things you can't touch or observe.
- Take a beloved hymn and add a new chorus or bridge to it for no apparent reason. Repeat the new chorus/bridge endlessly, making it the focal point.
- As mentioned before, write from God's perspective. Make it sound like a love letter a girlfriend wrote you at 4am after being up for 20 hours.
- Make the song demand something of God: Revival, Glory, Feeling, Power, etc…
- Mix your metaphors as much as possible. His love should be like a roaring lion, while you're a gentle flower. Use a metaphor once and then drop it in favor of the next one.
- Be vague and abstract. Spend 5 minutes talking about how you can't describe God. Compare him to things you can't touch or observe.
- Take a beloved hymn and add a new chorus or bridge to it for no apparent reason. Repeat the new chorus/bridge endlessly, making it the focal point.
- As mentioned before, write from God's perspective. Make it sound like a love letter a girlfriend wrote you at 4am after being up for 20 hours.
- Make the song demand something of God: Revival, Glory, Feeling, Power, etc…
just make it sound like Coldplay and your good to go
Tap-delay electric part. Actually, anything that even remotely resembles U2 or Coldplay.
Oh, and describe things you would see on a greeting card: space, mountains, storms, snow.
This whole array of posts is a sad commentary on one of the core problems within the church: the need to assert one's self as more knowledgeable or better than others. The only thing — and I do mean the ONLY thing — that a worship song has an obligation to accomplish is to help a congregation to experience relationship with God.
The personal experiences that a songwriter has may inform his or her own relationship with God, and because we are all fundamentally broken and share similar pain, it may help members of a worshiping body to conceive of their own situations in a new light that helps them toward the Lord. If a worship song is instructional and serves as a means of further pronouncing Biblical truths, then that is an added benefit. But Bible study, preaching, and other educational endeavors are more keenly directed at this purpose — and they're more effective.
Lastly, while I concur that there are definitely worship songs that reek of laziness, discarding statements about God's love for us because they are "trite" is misguided at best, since it is one of the things that is easiest for people to forget and also happens to be one of the primary narrative themes in the New Testament.
Thanks for taking time to comment. I appreciate it!
Unfortunately I have to disagree with you. To say that only thing that matters in a worship song is helping a person experience relationship with God is to ignore all that God has told us about himself. We're not allowed to worship God however we want to, and we're not allowed to say whatever we want to God. All that we sing must be informed by the Word of God or else we're no different than the rest of the world. If our singing isn't guided by truth, then there is nothing that separates us from those who don't know Christ and try to approach God on their own terms.
Does that make sense? I'm not trying to be nitpicky, but I think this is a crucial issue.
Your post is part of the problem that you seem to identify: "the need to assert one's self as more knowledgeable or better than others".
No, Heather, I was merely pointing out that we're collectively ONE body, and we're to love each other, not to tear each other down. But your previous post was by far the most inflammatory, so it comes as no surprise that this is the tack you would take. The moment one Christian judges him or herself to be a "better Christian" than another, everyone loses.
(This is Heather responding under my new username.)
Why does your response only strengthen my argument that your posts contribute to the problems you identify. Were you trying to "tear me down" or was that your unique way of showing Christian love?
Unreal.
Thanks for taking time to comment. I appreciate it!
Unfortunately I have to disagree with you. To say that only thing that matters in a worship song is helping a person experience relationship with God is to ignore all that God has told us about himself. We're not allowed to worship God however we want to, and we're not allowed to say whatever we want to God. All that we sing must be informed by the Word of God or else we're no different than the rest of the world. If our singing isn't guided by truth, then there is nothing that separates us from those who don't know Christ and try to approach God on their own terms.
Does that make sense? I'm not trying to be nitpicky, but I think this is a crucial issue.
Re-Write an old Hymn but replace the word 'sin' with the word 'heart'.
Example "At the cross, at the cross, where my Savior bled and died, and the burden of my 'heart' rolled away"
Example "At the cross, at the cross, where my Savior bled and died, and the burden of my 'heart' rolled away"
I can see why this might seem weird to some people, but I think its a brilliant application of Ephesians 5:19
"18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ"
What a great way to tackle our often individualistic 'worship' culture, and have a song that is designed to be sung by congregation members to the rest of the congregation, declaring great truths about God, that remind us of all we have to thank and praise him for.
One of my favourite hymns, How firm a foundation, is written this way, and the lyrics and a free download is available from Covenant Life Church.
See,http://www.covlife.org/static/hymns/how_firm_a_fo...
Great Post! My additions:
Spend the entire song talking about how we will worship, or how we are gathered to worship, without actually worshiping.
Make sure that it reflects post-modern angst with authority, rules, obligations, or the like, and instead focus on "falling in love" at all costs.
Re-Write an old Hymn but replace the word 'sin' with the word 'heart'.
"Judge Rightly", is not some man's name, it is a direct command to be followed. If this post were not so true of today's worship music, it would be funny. But it is true, so no it's NOT funny. It is serious.
Use this opportunity to correct your "bad" worship habits and write better worship songs!
"Judge Rightly", is not some man's name, it is a direct command to be followed. If this post were not so true of today's worship music, it would be funny. But it is true, so no it's NOT funny. It is serious.
Use this opportunity to correct your "bad" worship habits and write better worship songs!
I have one issue with G C D, but I digress. I think that you can be the antithesis of this list in the most part and still use G C D. I, however, am slightly biased in this regard
Are you familiar with "Jesus Thank You"? The bits in brackets are the bits I think to myself whilst singing. It's a great song!
Your blood has washed away my sin, Jesus thank you (expiation)
The Father's wrath completely satisfied, Jesus thank you (propitiation)
Once your enemy, now seated at your table, Jesus thank you (reconcilliation)
Kathryn,
Very creative. Nicely done!
I believe that expiation, propitiation and reconciliation are all used in the song "Atonement Q & A" by Shai Linne. Though not really a worship song, the rap tune offers a memorable way to connect with daunting theological terms and concepts.
Dave
my friends sometimes sing it like that too
Let the seams of your craftsmanship show… Like requiring Irritable Vowel Syndrome to make your rhymes work: "God is so ahh-suh… And I'm fahh-gi-vuh… His love washes oahh-vuh… maey."
Finish off with a podcast that contains your complete works
On the other hand you can write a song that is so complicated that no one except the truly cool enthusiasts for cool church music can sing along. Oh yeah, make sure it's loud so that people need ear plugs. You don't care cos you're wearing those $$$ ear protectors that filter certain frequencies while your band is playing.
Why must the music be so quiet — I suspect that when David was dancing before the Lord and his clothes came off, that the music probably was loud with thumping drums. Most of the folks that I know who argue for quiet music tend to be controlling types who refuse to accept anything other than what represents their narrow view of God and worship, while we who want more vigorous melodies and tunes go ahead and accept quiet music in the name of avoiding controversy.
There is a huge difference between quiet and needing earplugs to keep from going deaf while sitting in service! Do you really think God is pleased by us destroying our hearing in the name of worship? How does he feel about you damaging the hearing of a little child in your congregation. My ears cut out at a certain decibel and when they do I face a nasty headache that night. I have had to walk out of churches because the noise was a health hazard.
Noise in David's day could not reach the sustained damaging frequencies that we face today. The thumping drums of David's day did not have the advanced technology (snares, synthetic drum heads, etc) or microphones on them to magnify their noise either.
I am a musician who likes upbeat and loud, not upbeat and deafening. If you want deafening, you should wear hearing aids to worship instead of forcing the children of the church to need them later in life.
Being an amateur, local-church songwriter I could definitely add some other do's and dont's to the list, and I too have a notebook filled with songs that sounded good at the time (I thought) but now make me cringe. But think I've figured out that a good worship song doesn't follow any formula, or doesn't NOT follow some other formula. A good worship song is one that is anointed by God for His glory and purpose. Sometimes that purpose is to teach great theology, other times it's to express how we feel towards life and our Lord. Just ask David the Psalmist.
On the other hand you can write a song that is so complicated that no one except the truly cool enthusiasts for cool church music can sing along. Oh yeah, make sure it's loud so that people need ear plugs. You don't care cos you're wearing those $$$ ear protectors that filter certain frequencies while your band is playing.
On the other hand you can write a song that is so complicated that no one except the truly cool enthusiasts for cool church music can sing along. Oh yeah, make sure it's loud so that people need ear plugs. You don't care cos you're wearing those $$$ ear protectors that filter certain frequencies while your band is playing.
This could also be titled, "How to Write a Hit Worship Song"
Hahahaha I love this…would love to hear how to preach a bad sermon next
Yes Lord, yes Lord, yes, yes, Lord! Yes Lord, yes Lord, yes, yes, Lord! Yes Lord, yes Lord, yes, yes Lord, Amen!
You could repeat "Glory to God". Oh wait, Steve Fee already did it. And honestly to hear a congregation sing out with all their heart "Glory to God!" is amazing. A good worship song shouldn't get too far into theology. Cause singing a song about predestination probably isn't a good song. Also, the majority of people in a congregation aren't people who study the bible for hours every day. I like the post a couple days ago that said basically David wrote an entire hymn book based off personal experiences. IT'S IN THE BIBLE!!!! So, why can't WE write out of personal experiences? Just my personal opinion to not bash people for writing a worship song. Just cause you can't worship to them, doesn't mean that someone else in their walk with Christ can't!
Wow, you really have no idea, do you? Ever read the Bible much. The worship songs written by God's people and recorded in the Bible are absolutely jam-packed with God-centered theology. Have you read Ephesians 1? Paul is praising God for the blessing of adoption, redemption and wait for it, predestination!
We can write songs out of personal experiences. What do you think the anthem of Christendom," Amazing Grace" was about? Gracious salvation towards a man who saw himself as a wretched sinner deserving the worst.
I am very much into Fee, Tomlin, Stanfill, Hillsong and groups like that. I do not worship to old hymns like "On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand". For decades, this was "worship" music. Is this just "poetic", or is it real worship? I believe for many people, it is real worship, but for me, I would rather sing the my God is "Mighty to Save"!!
This is just my opinion, and I understand that some people are further along in their spiritual walk than others. But I think we should be writing songs that people will want to listen to every day of the week, not just on sundays. Two of the biggest bands of the past couple decades are U2 and Coldplay. If this is what people listen to, write like them.
Todd Fields told a friend, when he writes, he takes a song that he very much enjoys. He decides what he liked about that song or a couple songs, and he immulates it. Is this stealing? No! If you think this way, send me your song and I will find 5 more that sound just the same.
Your insights reveal why people prefer to "love God" than have anything to do with theology. To be sure, gospel objectivity is important–arguably necessary–for every worship song. But your comments contradict the grace that you presuppose in your songs.
Robert – I think you mean to say "emulate," not immulate.
To everyone – I agree that there is appropriate personal and corporate worship, and that they are not always the same thing. Our worship songs should be sincere, and should represent our best efforts in songwriting and poetry. I do not think God minds when we write/use a "trite" song or one that is just plain bad, as long as we are truly seeking to honor Him. That said, why WOULDN'T we want to do our very, very best when creating worship music to share with others as a means of honoring God? As a worship director of a church that has traditional and contemporary services, I personally don't want to waste my time choosing songs that aren't good "food" for the congregation, whether they are hymns or praise songs.
I didn't read through all of the posts, so hopefully someone else hasn't said these, although these are more performance, rather than songwriting issues:
1) Use a few extreme vocal riffs to show off your talent – the more different notes used the better.
B) Turn up the electic guitar to full volume for best effect – when you see people plugging their ears, you know you got it right – either that or they just don't appreciate how good you are..
III) Close your eyes or look around randomly, don't make any direct contact with the congregation.
4) Don't rehearse – all the other musicians will pick it up after the first go around.
not sure how i feel about th third one. worship isn't about the worship leader connecting with the audience, it's about the all of them, together, connecting with and giving praise to God…and closing your eyes is a good way to keep the focus off your performance and what people are thinking of you and instead to be thinknig about God and Who He is and the condition of your heart.
Make sure you tell people what they're doing right now while they are singing. It is particularly useful to make sure people sing about the fact that they are singing. But tell people what they're also doing (e.g., raising hands, dancing, shouting, etc.) so that they feel either a) unspiritual or guilty for not doing it or b) move in unison to perform the requisite task.
i think this post is very funny.
and for everyone bickering, you can take this post as lightly or as intensely as you want, but it was written to make you laugh (mostly at yourself). Stop trying to correct people, because usually if we examine ourself we are the one who needs correcting…Believers pointing the finger at each other, and constantly trying to correct one another is the reason why the church is so stagnant.
How many of you people speak 100 % theologically correct when you pray? Just wondering.
i agree. you guys are acting like people that write worship songs are idiots…you think you're superior or something?
yeah i happen to write them myself. just because we're glorifying God different then your old tradition..thanks for making me feel like an idiot
Ok, Kids..throw out Yes, Jesus Loves Me…It has the word "me" in it so that makes it bad. It also has pure rhymes that are obvious…know and so. It's a repetitious melody, too. Thanks for your expert advice.
Don't forget the obligatory structure:
Verse
Chorus
Verse
Chorus
Verse
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Chorus
Start off in a really high key so hardly anyone can reach the notes. Have at least three octaves so that the congregation can't get around it by singing down an octave and when you perform it in church repeat lines at random, in ecstasy, so the congregation get lost and the only people worshiping is the worship team up the front. Alternatively play really, really fast so the congregation cant take a breath and have to concentrate so hard on the production of sound that they cant think about the words or actually worshiping God. Turn up the amps so that the music isn't ruined by the untrained voices of the congregation coz really its all about the worship team's performance.
this is funny. Thanks to all folks who are willing and able to have a sense of humor about themselves and others. Joy from laughter is healing. You made me laugh so thank you. Keep up your creativity to help us all get to a point where we know parody is a form of Grace.
Peace,
Dwight
Colossians 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
*This passage describes a purpose of worship i.e teaching and admonishing and how we are intended to worship (with thankfulness) (a Biblical formula)
Good topic insightful and amusing.
Verse-Chorus-Verse-Chorus-Break-Verse. Never diverge from that formula.
Also include complex syncopation that no congregation could replicate
i enjoy reading this one. there are so many worship songs that do no reflect God at all. Makes me wanna go back to the hymns. As long as we're singing what we want to hear and not what God wants us to sing, there will be more awful worships songs coming our way.
Make sure that the chords are all 2nd's, suspended 4ths, or anything that's spacey sounding, so as to give a sensation of spirituality that the removal of edifying words might have provided. If you can sound gravelly in your voice… something like falling asleep is good too…. it will help all the more.
There are thousands of great songs of worship and praise to God and we should focus on ones that are inspired by Biblical theology and speak truth. Yes, there are awful songs out there that are written as a worship song to God and for the composers, they are worship for them. However, do not criticize the entire genre of worship music based on the minority. If that were the case, everyone could make an argument as to how to write a terrible love song, rock song, country song, or rap song. This conversation does nothing to encourage people and improve others song writing abilities. This conversation tears people down and stifles people who are at the very least, trying to put music to their feelings.
Lastly (from me, I hope), is to be sure that corporate praise singing has at least 3 video cameras for the 3 large-screen monitors to show close-ups of the guitar player & drummer playing, and the vocalists singing. It is all about them after all! Go ahead, be entertained!
HOW TO WRITE AN AWFUL WORSHIP SONG (CONTINUED)
Keep on shifting between King James language and "The Message" language.
Use guitar chords that don't appear in most guitar chord books.
Use complicated rhythms not intended for congregational singing, knowing churches / assemblies will try it anyway.
Write songs which tell God how lucky he is that we 'chose' Him over other options, and how happy he should be that we choose to lift our hands to worship him.
Write songs intended to have no real ending ("I can sing of your love forever [repeat 50 times]).
Write songs that focus on feelings and self-centered desires, rather than Christ's payment for our sins at the cross and God-centered action. Focus on how much love we can muster toward God rather than the unbelievable love He showed us when Jesus suffered and died on the cross to be an atoning sacrifice for all our sin, once for all.
Avoid saying anything about our sins and sinfulness. Focus on generalized attributes of God, such as "You are good…", repeating ad infinitum.
Shift beween Biblical imagery (eg. about King David) and moden-day imagery ("…a kitchen chair"). Include a biblical word (eg. "Hallelujah").
Ok I have to say this as I didnt read it at all in anyone's post I will return to the Colossians scripture mentioned above but I would like to set the tone. We are to try and try to make the Psalms Hymns and Spiritual Songs better. First thing that means is that we actually try to make songs to God. All of us if we are not actually doing that, we are falling short. And if we do fall short then who are we to judge when we didnt obey that??? I would think Jesus wants all of us to pour our lives out G C D and sing lalala and fumble time and key and break the mold on a golden oldie. U2 and Coldplay are not trying to do it. I doubt seriously if an attempt was made by you who know best that there would not be some spiritual fruit so Be CREATIVE Do CREATION Live like the CREATOR. Give each other a beak and soar!!!!
And this is exactly why being a music minister is so frustrating. You can never please anyone no matter what songs you choose. Very discouraging.
correction, few of the comments are holy
Thanks but i want to know how to write beautiful songs that will bless God and everybody who hears it….
Thanks
Don't forget the JPM's! I literally had a friend who had written some decent worship music approach a Christian music label and they told him the reason they couldn't take his music was because he didn't have enough "Jesus' Per Minute."
You need to use the 7/11 rule. Sing a 7 word phrase, 11 times at the end to impress it upon their hearts so they'll never forget!!
I am just smiling
Hey, I know a song that meets these criteria! It's called "Psalm 57" by this guy David. Check it out!
• Use Time Tested Rhymes.
"Have mercy on me, my God, have mercy on me…"
Oh man, how many times have we heard that!
• Be Vague About Your Theology
"God sends forth his love and his faithfulness"
I hear this stuff from New Agers all the time.
• Make the Song All About You
10 "I"s, 6 "my"s and 4 "me"s.
• Be Incredibly Poetic
"men whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are sharp swords."
What? I can't even visualize that.
• Use Well-Worn Musical Progressions
"To the tune of 'Do Not Destroy'".
Ugh, just like Psalm 58, 59 and 75. Come on, get original!
• Defend Your Song Like It’s Your Firstborn Child
Apparently it was so important to David that he made everyone sing it, and now we even consider it Scripture! The nerve….
Am I being too acerbic? I'm trying to make a point. Let's leave the song evaluations to the Lord. We're not the intended audience.
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God bless you!
I think the hard part is that there is just soo much christian music out there! A lot of it is great and encouraging and because us church goers love to listen to it we decide to use it in our worship sets! This can be great if it was in fact written as a worship song. The purpose of worship is to sing praises TO GOD, but most of the songs end up singing ABOUT God. Songs about God are absolutely wonderful and so encouraging to listen to and be reminded of his promises to us or be reminded of his love for us, but I think when we go to sing praises TO him we need our focus to be us truly worshipping and praising him for who he is. instead of being used as a time to remind ourselves what we are going to do for him or what he wants to do with us. We need our worship to no longer be about us and start going back to the "heart of worship" if I do say so myself!
I had thought about replying, but you did a much better job than I could have! We worship God in Spirit and in truth! Our worship is to offer our bodies as living sacrifices to God. God has defined the terms of worship and the terms of the relationship.
Singing songs simply serves to spur and strengthen the soul to solidarity in our saviour!
I think that these things are informed by the Word of God, and the fault you're finding with them is in the way they choose to express a particular sentiment. Imparting the intent of the message while sticking by doctrine is the most crucial purpose of the Church. Pastors preach in an attempt to make the sometimes obscured truths of the Bible plain for the less-trained members of a congregation to understand. Object lessons and other methods are afflicted by the same kind of issues that you're questioning in songs. And though you may have meant no ill in writing this post, I believe that God rarely encourages mocking others, and especially not those who believe in Him.
Everyone is free to disagree, but I think that this is a dangerous and destructive game to play.
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