One of the many signs studied
LOUISVILLE – Scientists at the University of Louisville have identified a rare genetic condition that causes people to be emotionally moved by witty church signs. Richard Moorehead, who lead the study, said, “As far as we can tell, this condition affects less than 1% of the population. It’s extremely rare. So far we have identified three individuals in the country who have the condition.”
John McCardell, one of the three individuals affected with the condition, said, “It’s hard to explain. Like last week, I passed a church with a sign that said ‘God Answers Knee Mail’. Tears filled my eyes. The whole play on words thing, the reminder to pray, it just hit me like a ton of bricks. Yeah, I could said an email to God, but it would be so much better to send a knee mail. I was crying so hard that I had to pull my car off the road. That church sign was like a sign from heaven.”
Emily McCoy, who also has the condition, said, “I used to be a hardcore atheist. I loved debating Christians and mocking them. I was a big Christopher Hitchens fan. One day I was driving down the road and it was like, 100 degrees out. I was sweating like a pig. Sweat was dripping everywhere – in my eyes, all over my car. And I was cursing up a storm because I was so hot. Then I saw a church sign that said: ‘Think It’s Hot Here?’ Wow. Talk about powerful. I realized that yeah, it’s hot here, but it’s way hotter in hell. Right then and there I got saved. Thank you church sign, thank you. Billy Graham couldn’t have preached a better sermon.”
Moorehead said, “We’re not really sure what causes this condition. We think it may be tied to the number of Hallmark made for TV movies the person’s mother watched while pregnant.”
There is no known cure for this condition.
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the brilliance and zaniness of the Altrogge mind is what scientists really need to study!
"CH _ _ CH . What's missing? U R!" Yep, they're concise, they're hilarious,, AND they're moving. These signs have EVERYTHING.
who needs 'fake church sign' creating websites when we have the real thing? this is great!
Oh my. I love this! I do enjoy the church signs, mainly because they make me laugh. But an effective tool? Probably not so much.
Usually the message on the sign is as good or better than the one you hear when the pastor starts yacking.
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